OK. Yes, It is a shameless trick. I AM hoping the "Adult Eyes Only" comment would increase my hit count. The point of my innuendo was that I will be speaking honestly about Santa and perhaps a Santa-believing child might not wish to hear this. Therefore proceed with caution.
First off, let me establish that my family loves Santa. We have tree ornaments that are of Santa and usually watch any Christmas cartoons that include Santa, especially Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer and my girls have recently taken a picture with Santa. But, like Frosty the Snowman and Rudolph, my wife and I have made a point of explaining to our girls that Santa is a fairy tale. Now, before all of the Civil Conservative readers fall on the floor from shock, let me give my best explanation at why I'm willing to rip this exciting fantasy away from my kids. Hopefully, I can present a compelling case for any parents to consider.
I will focus my case towards those readers who have Faith in God. Although I will note that even atheists can argue the point that we should not teach our children that Santa is real, my argument is based on those who wish to nurture and strengthen your child's Faith. For any of you who are from the South Bay and believe you're a big deal, walking through the Del Amo mall some Christmas season will tell you that many countries have different variations on Santa Claus. What is generally understood in the US about Santa is mainly through popular songs. Santa has a list of all children that he checks twice - the nice list and the naughty list. Those on the nice list get presents, while those on the naughty list get coal in their stockings or nothing. These lists are created of course, due to his ever-watchful eyes. He knows if you've been bad or good, so you'd better be good for goodness sake. At supernatural speeds, he goes to every house in the world to deliver presents to children based on his lists. To any of those who are Christian, this role may sound a bit familiar to you. Well, like God actually. That is what God does. We believe that He is the One who watches you at all places at all times, and assesses your behavior and rewards you for your deeds. What's important to note is that even if a parent does not explain to their child each of these Godly characteristics and connects them to Santa, by merely playing the game that he exists is tacit approval of this portrayal of Santa that is taught to the children through our culture.
As a matter of full disclosure, I was taught about Santa. In fact, my mom still gives me presents from Santa. Indeed, I am not warped (despite what Trishee might say) by it, nor have I lost my Faith in the Almighty. I concede this point to show that I'm not making an exaggerated point but a subtle one. I do not believe that children who are told Santa is real will be screwed up, they will survive. Please know that I understand this. I do not contend this being a make or break decision to their happiness. But I do believe that Faith is a very fragile thing and this tender time of innocence is a fertile ground for planting seeds of Faith that make deep roots. Any one who has children can clearly see the purity of their souls. To maintain this purity, they require clarity on a real, but intangible & invisible God. How to see His beauty in nature, how to feel His leadership directing them, and how to hear His subtle call when the distractions are very loud need strong Faith.
Oh, the test we would have given them to reveal that Mommy and Daddy have lied to them year after year. Each year our lies becoming more elaborate to outsmart their challenging questions. I believe this would affect their trust in us, albeit in an unconscious way. I would be concerned that this fun is jading their ability to trust an unseen Santa-like figure who is watching their lives looking for their correct behavior? When they grow up and get out into the mainstream world and are told that God is a Fairy Tale just like Santa Claus, will this have any traction with them due to our attempts to mislead them? or will they have the proper foundation from which to answer?
I am very aware this is a counter-cultural idea, as I've viewed many peoples' astounded faces when I have told them of this decision my wife and I have made. As such, please do not hold back and give me your two cents on this issue. Is there any validity to this position? Or am I harming our kids by not allowing them to fully experience Christmas?
First off, let me establish that my family loves Santa. We have tree ornaments that are of Santa and usually watch any Christmas cartoons that include Santa, especially Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer and my girls have recently taken a picture with Santa. But, like Frosty the Snowman and Rudolph, my wife and I have made a point of explaining to our girls that Santa is a fairy tale. Now, before all of the Civil Conservative readers fall on the floor from shock, let me give my best explanation at why I'm willing to rip this exciting fantasy away from my kids. Hopefully, I can present a compelling case for any parents to consider.
I will focus my case towards those readers who have Faith in God. Although I will note that even atheists can argue the point that we should not teach our children that Santa is real, my argument is based on those who wish to nurture and strengthen your child's Faith. For any of you who are from the South Bay and believe you're a big deal, walking through the Del Amo mall some Christmas season will tell you that many countries have different variations on Santa Claus. What is generally understood in the US about Santa is mainly through popular songs. Santa has a list of all children that he checks twice - the nice list and the naughty list. Those on the nice list get presents, while those on the naughty list get coal in their stockings or nothing. These lists are created of course, due to his ever-watchful eyes. He knows if you've been bad or good, so you'd better be good for goodness sake. At supernatural speeds, he goes to every house in the world to deliver presents to children based on his lists. To any of those who are Christian, this role may sound a bit familiar to you. Well, like God actually. That is what God does. We believe that He is the One who watches you at all places at all times, and assesses your behavior and rewards you for your deeds. What's important to note is that even if a parent does not explain to their child each of these Godly characteristics and connects them to Santa, by merely playing the game that he exists is tacit approval of this portrayal of Santa that is taught to the children through our culture.
As a matter of full disclosure, I was taught about Santa. In fact, my mom still gives me presents from Santa. Indeed, I am not warped (despite what Trishee might say) by it, nor have I lost my Faith in the Almighty. I concede this point to show that I'm not making an exaggerated point but a subtle one. I do not believe that children who are told Santa is real will be screwed up, they will survive. Please know that I understand this. I do not contend this being a make or break decision to their happiness. But I do believe that Faith is a very fragile thing and this tender time of innocence is a fertile ground for planting seeds of Faith that make deep roots. Any one who has children can clearly see the purity of their souls. To maintain this purity, they require clarity on a real, but intangible & invisible God. How to see His beauty in nature, how to feel His leadership directing them, and how to hear His subtle call when the distractions are very loud need strong Faith.
Oh, the test we would have given them to reveal that Mommy and Daddy have lied to them year after year. Each year our lies becoming more elaborate to outsmart their challenging questions. I believe this would affect their trust in us, albeit in an unconscious way. I would be concerned that this fun is jading their ability to trust an unseen Santa-like figure who is watching their lives looking for their correct behavior? When they grow up and get out into the mainstream world and are told that God is a Fairy Tale just like Santa Claus, will this have any traction with them due to our attempts to mislead them? or will they have the proper foundation from which to answer?
I am very aware this is a counter-cultural idea, as I've viewed many peoples' astounded faces when I have told them of this decision my wife and I have made. As such, please do not hold back and give me your two cents on this issue. Is there any validity to this position? Or am I harming our kids by not allowing them to fully experience Christmas?
Very well written and extremely valid and relevant points....funny story, my son (when he was in kindergarten) actually got in trouble because he announced to his classmates that "my mommy and daddy said that Santa Claus doesn't exist" LOL We were actually having the same discussion that you spoke of in this blog about how Santa is merely a figure that represents the whole IDEA surrounding Christmas and that it was important to realize that Christmas was about something so much bigger than an obese man who climbed down everyone's chimney and monitored the behavior of each and every child in the world...Nicely done Mike!!
ReplyDeleteI agree…there is SO MUCH more to Christmas than Santa Claus. But I do believe that Santa CAN have a part in the tradition, if he is presented properly to kids and not – as you fear – depicted as God or anything even close to Him.
ReplyDeleteI love the purity and innocence of children. There’s nothing more precious in this world. Childhood is such a short timeframe, and it gets shorter and shorter with each generation. Therefore, why not let them enjoy the things exclusive to youth?
You and Trish are wise to want to establish a strong foundation of Faith, and a deep understanding of God’s love for us. If you continue to teach them by your words and by your example, I see no reason why they would ever lose trust in you or in their Faith in God...even if Santa did pay them a visit.
Merry Christmas! From Sarita Peay
my son freaked when i told him santa wasn't real. he hated that we lied to him for 3 or so years. he felt so betrayed. sad, but true, so be careful parents!
ReplyDeletesabrina marasovich
Well said but I think you missed the story of Saint Nicholas. My daughter Nicole loves her patron Saint and understands the story of the original Saint Nicholas. She is 8 and doesn't want to give up on the idea of Santa. You can tell because her questions have stopped even with her younger brother insisting on asking questions of how it's possible for Santa to accomplish his monumental task in one night!
ReplyDeleteLet the children have a little fun and you can teach them the wonders of God and Christmas at the same time. You actually can pull off both! Then you can enjoy their sweet innocence and they will have fun stories when we are all old and gray about how their parents went on and on with crazy stories about Santa and how they first found out he wasn’t real. Like my sister who opened the dryer one day and thought she could talk to Santa. Where she got that idea we’ll never know. She’s now a Catholic nun in a convent and doing very well despite the lies our parents told us!